'Evil Dead' review by Captain Raptor

'Evil Dead' review by Captain Raptor

I've been training for this review for a while, it would seem. Over the past months I've watched Evil Dead II and an assortment of other 80's movies, the idea being to give me a better understanding of the culture the film comes from and what it is to be compared to. That seems to have been a waste of time, as the new Evil Dead is an entirely different beast to what I have already seen. The threadbare plot is still the same, and there's a couple of things they've kept in from the original (would it really be an Evil Dead film without a tree-molestation scene or a chainsaw?), but tonally this film is almost unrecognisable.

The thing is, the new Evil Dead is a horror movie and nothing but. Its predecessors blurred the line between what's so horrific it's frightening and what's so horrific it's hilarious; it was a horror-comedy in the truest sense. Fede Alvarez's latest version has no humour to offer up whatsoever, choosing to go the full horror route. It keep some of the original films's successes, like the intense POV shots, although filming it with a high-resolution camera kind of ruins the atmosphere. The cinematography is very crisp, very effective in all other circumstances, however. The other positive similarity is that both films use the savagery of the demons sophisticatedly. A lot of horror films are content to scare the viewer simply by making them jump, whereas Evil Dead has greater ambitions: any fear comes from a sheer sense of dread, as the tormenting demon does increasingly disturbing damage to both its own and its victim's bodies. It veers on becoming torture porn, but it's nice to see a horror movie attempt to mentally scar the audience rather than merely cause them to twitch. The atmosphere of the film is near-perfect: a foreboding pre-credits scene gives you an idea what to expect from our hellish antagonist, and as you watch the teens innocently use various sharp and electrical appliances at the beginning of the film, you can immediately start to see how badly things are going to go.

The obvious element the film is lacking is one Ashley J motherfucking Williams. It would be nice to see more from our wide-eyed, amputated friend, but all things must come to an end. The real error is that a franchise that produced one of cinema's coolest heroes was incapable of producing a single memorable character. I accept for a 90 minute horror film that characterisation isn't exactly a priority, but I left the cinema only remembering one character's name, and there were times when I could not care less about what was going to happen to somebody because they were so bland. The worst of the bunch is Eric, played by Lou Taylor Pucci. He's the irritating one who accidently summons the ancient hellspawn, because somebody has to (although all I could think of were the wise words of The Cabin In The Wood's Marty: "I'm drawing a line in the sand. Do not read the fucking Latin") and he then has the audacity to criticize the other characters for failing to deal with the situation appropriately. The dialogue is awful, and the decision to treat the film with complete seriousness makes it look foolish, both because it's painfully unoriginal and particularly because they could have drawn some excellent black comedy out of mistaking demonic behaviour for heroin withdrawal symptoms, a key part of the plot treated entirely straight-faced. The characters commit the same clichéd acts that all teenagers in horror movies do, which gives the film a feel of repetitiveness and redundancy.

Some interesting set-pieces aside, Evil Dead brings nothing to the table, and it might have been better to let the franchise rest in peace. The characters are infuriating; you might start rooting for the demon because at least it's interesting, and all the gore in the world (the film uses an astonishing 25,000 litres of fake blood) can't compensate for the ensuing boredom when the film starts acting predictably. Evil Dead is a film with some good intentions that falls flat on its feet, but badly made horror is still watchable. In terms of films about mutilating young adults in the woods, it pales in comparison to the original Evil Dead films and The Cabin In The Woods, but there are jaw-dropping moments and the atmosphere that runs through the piece is enthralling enough to at least make it better than Cabin Fever.

'The Breakfast Club' review by Captain Raptor

'The Breakfast Club' review by Captain Raptor

Due to the upcoming remakes of Evil Dead and Robocop, I've recently taken it upon myself to get to grips with other classic 80's movies. Perhaps the most quintessential film of the 1980's is John Hughes' The Breakfast Club, watermarked by its Human League soundtrack, casual use of homophobic slurs and references to Barry Manilow. This film marks the pinnacle of my voyage into a decade of leg warmers and Rubik's Cubes. 

A lot about the film is incredibly simple: there's no complicated cinematography, the plot is essentially 'five people go to a room', and the characters are deliberately stereotyped. However none of this is detrimental towards the film in any manner as Hughes has chosen to make the film about dialogue and emotion rather than storytelling. The five teens that comprise the titular Breakfast Club are 5 high school stereotypes (The Jock, The Beauty, The Geek, The Recluse and The Rebel) to which everybody should relate to at least one of, and it's remarkable the way the in which film seamlessly develops from having the five sit in silent contempt of each other to bearing their heart and soul completely. It's a great teenage movie, championing the idiocy and individuality found in adolescents, and the film comes to an emotional climax that simply involves the five characters sitting in a circle and being completely honest about their feelings towards themselves and their parents. The corniness of the film's message that deep down we are all alike is overruled by the intelligence and surprise with which it is revealed, as seemingly socially harmonious individuals show astounding insecurities and people whose problems appear to be minor are shown to be a worthy of sympathy as anybody else. 

The film's sense of drama and emotion lends it a lot of credit and is done to near perfection by a superb script and cast. The comedy doesn't quite reach the same high level, particularly in the earliest stages of the film, but there are funny moments, mostly provided by the kooky goth Allison (Ally Sheedy) and socially inept nerd Brian (Anthony Michael Hall, playing the same role he always did in those days). Even when its not funny, the dialogue is still entertaining, littered with hints about the backstories and lives of the wonderfully developed and realised characters. My only real problem with the film is the damp squib of an ending, which despite a touching voice over by Brian feels a little anti-climatic - after an hour and a half of arguing and bonding, I don't feel the ending has any real sense of closure, but I suppose leaving me wanting more is a sign of the film's success. My other irritation (skip to the last paragraph to avoid spoilers) is that while most of the characters learn a lesson of accepting others and being proud of themselves, poor gothic Allison's resolution is to completely change her appearance and attitude to win the affection of another, which comes across as 'Oh, we're all good people really. Except you. You have to change' which would seem to be an exercise in self-defeat in relation to the message of the film.

The Breakfast Club contains so much 80's culture that it should feel alienating, but the story of teens lacking self-confidence is so universal that it resonates just as strongly in the modern world as it did back in the day. There's some laughs, and a few tragic implications, but the main thing I've taken away from this genuinely beautiful and moving film is that we're all the same on the inside. That and some awesome dance moves.

'Jack the Giant Slayer' review by Captain Raptor

'Jack the Giant Slayer' review by Captain Raptor

It's not a sterling sign of success that Jack the Giant Slayer has made so little money that it might possibly bankrupt Digital Domain, the production company that financed it. I wouldn't have gone to see it myself if the director of the first two X-Men films Bryan Singer wasn't helming the project. It's stuck in a profit-making dead zone; a little too much violence and the occasional swearing means it isn't a kids film, but the childish premise means that it can't be marketed as a full-on blockbuster either. But a film's profit does not denote its quality, and I'm definitely willing to give a Singer/Ewan McGregor team-up a chance.

Saying that, Jack the Giant Slayer is stupid, lazy and incredibly clichéd. Following the age-old plotline of 'man saves princess from monsters' means the film isn't off to a great start, and the strongest part of a fairytale is supposed to be its narrative. Characters take courses of action for no justifiable reason (in particular Stanley Tucci's villainous Roderick, who kills an ally without motivation just in case the audience wasn't capable of grasping the fact that the man dressed entirely in black who sneers at everyone is in fact the bad guy), and in various instances contradict themselves entirely. An early scene shows the princess Isabelle getting frustrated that she is treated different because of her gender and says she wishes people would let her be independent. This would all be well and good if the character didn't spend the next hour and a half screaming, getting repeatedly captured, crying for help and literally not helping anybody in any way at any point. It's also hard to root for our hero Jack, as the script tries to make him so ordinary and everyman that he's totally lacking in any personality or charm. There's a saving grace in Ewan McGregor, hamming it up to perfection as the noble warrior Elmont, quite possibly the poshest character in the history of cinema, but one enjoyably overacted performance is not enough to compensate for an entire cast of poorly written characters. Even the nominally badass one-liners after giants get slain are limp and laughable.

So, as is too often the case with major movies, storytelling, dialogue and characters are sacrificed to showcase action and set-pieces. The giants themselves look and act as you'd expect - stupid and ugly creatures, with a lot of childish humour about their bodily functions, but they get the job done and certainly feel like a viable threat. The action is routine, with nothing interesting or inventive enough to warrant specific mention, although I would like to point out the scene where a metal bell collides with a stone wall to cause an implausible explosion. In a similar notion of calling the film's stupidity, there is a bald character whose name is Bald, and this disproportionately irritates me. The film's not entirely without its positives: the large-scale destructive rampaging of the giants is an impressive sight to behold, and there's a wisp of humour gained from McGregor's Trainspotting co-star Ewen Bremner as an idiotic manservant, but none of this can elevate Jack the Giant Slayer any higher than 'OK' at best. 

 My regard of Bryan Singer has fallen considerably after watching this film, and I thank God for Ewan McGregor to alleviate what would have otherwise been a truly grating experience. Jack may slay giants, but this comes at the cost of boredom, sexism, clichés and stupidity. A more enjoyable final act does not pardon the blandness and lack of thought seen in the film's first hour and a half, and frankly it feels like poetic justice that this film is making such an enormous loss. 

'Serenity' review by Captain Raptor

'Serenity' review by Captain Raptor (contains vague spoilers)

I've had one or two people tell me since I've started this blog that my reviews seem unprofessional and that I'm not harsh enough on the films I critique. Those who know me will doubtlessly be aware of my unending and passionate love for the works of writer/director Joss Whedon (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Avengers Assemble), primarily because I refuse to be silent on the subject. Serenity is the movie adaptation of Whedon's quickly cancelled sci-fi/western series Firefly (which I strongly recommend you familiarize yourself with before watching the movie), and follows the exploits of a group of lovable rogues as they attempt to bring down the oppressive regime that rules the galaxy. This plot may seem familiar. 

Cutting to the chase, Serenity is an absolute masterpiece, a funny and dramatic action film with intelligence and thrills in equal measure. A phenomenal cast (there is not a character in this film that isn't vastly entertaining, brilliantly written and beloved by all the fans) is headed up by Nathan Fillion (Castle, Slither) as the vaguely heroic Captain Reynolds; the character is often compared to that of Han Solo but due to a proficient backstory and an excellent performance, Reynolds is a much more realised and developed character, and the script portrays him as a man who has his honour but no real desire to help anybody but his crew rather than a typical blockbuster hero or an all round good guy. This is matched in Serenity's villain, known only as The Operative, a highly religious man who only commits the atrocities he does because he wants to make the world a better place. An understandable villain and a realistic hero is indicative of Joss' methods in the film, trying to subvert clichés at all corners (admittedly he succumbs to some of the more basic tropes).

 The film's other stand out performance comes from cult heroine Summer Glau (Sarah Connor Chronicles, most famous for her role here) as the traumatized and quietly insane River Tam, a psychic whose ass-kicking abilities (when substantially provoked) know no bounds. A constant look of terror and confusion on her face, Summer steals every scene she's in as the odd and frail-looking psychic. There's so much more I want to write about this film's excellence, but that would require an entire novel's worth of words to express, so I shall limit myself to saying that the plot is intelligent, surprising and inventive, the dialogue sizzles with Whedon's typical humour and the action sequences are mesmerising, Glau making sure to fully utilize her training as a ballet dancer while destroying rooms full of enemies. 

Any flaws I have with this film basically come from the fact that it isn't as good as Firefly. Watching the crew of the ship scrape through their weekly encounters almost feels like home, whereas the more advanced camera techniques and variety of sets actually do the film a disservice by making it seem too glossy. Serenity is largely story based, so people who haven't seen the TV series won't know that Wash is incredibly funny and that Shepherd Book is a comforting guiding figure just from watching the film alone, because Serenity's two hour runtime doesn't give it enough time to fully re-introduce and explore all the wonderful characters from Firefly. And obviously, there's the classic fan complaint that he shouldn't have killed any of the characters that we love so dearly, but it certainly adds a lot of drama to the proceedings (a friend who joined me for this re-watching was literally in tears for half an hour, although a lot of that is because somebody reminded her of Forrest Gump).

In short, Serenity is an almost perfect movie, and you can see it serves as a template for Whedon's later success in Avengers Assemble, mixing jaw-dropping action with humour and genuine intelligence. The cast all give their finest ever performances, and really, who could protest to a movie about spaceships, civil war, flesh-eating lunatics, conspiracies and cowboys? As Kaylee so expertly put it, everything's shiny Cap'n.